The Kephas-Strieber-Mother-Strangled Inner-Outer Connections


  • Debbie, a long-time reader and a new voice at this blog, suggested three days ago a possible Pluto-Moon oppositional aspect between Strieber and my astrological charts (and/or mine and Heinrich’s).
  • I found online information for Strieber’s birth date and time, and used Lyn Birkbeck’s Instant Astrologer program to create a relationship chart between Strieber and myself. While there isn’t a Pluto-Moon opposition between our charts, there is a T-square between my own Pluto-Moon opposition and Strieber’s Sun, i.e., his total being, while Strieber himself has a Pluto-Moon conjunction in his chart.
  • Oppositions (180 degree angle between planets) are sometimes called “secret conjunctions” (0 degree angles). Birkbeck’s IA program has the same descriptions for both aspects, meaning that Strieber and I (more or less) share the specific astrological configuration which Debbie intuitively zeroed in on.
  • In general terms, Pluto-Moon oppositions and conjunctions signify a psyche “darkly” bonded to that of the mother, i.e., mother-bondage in its negative form. This is a subject I podcasted about in great detail a couple of years ago. One result of this is a feeling of being absorbed or controlled by other people’s emotions, a sense of paranoia, and a distrust of human nature.
  • It also signifies a secret between the child and mother, whether that of the hidden bond between them, or some secret that one keeps from the other, or both.
  • The Pluto-Moon aspect in my chart adequately reflects my early relationship with my mother, who was an alcoholic and who drank while I was in the womb. It’s fair to say that, as an infant, I absorbed her negative emotions and felt controlled by her moods. I must have felt suffocated by her psyche, even as early as the womb, due to the polluting element of alcohol.
  • Such experiences imprinted me early on with a feeling of paranoia, powerlessness, and distrust of others.
  • While my mother may have had secrets from me (this was the focus of our last ever conversation, though I never found out for sure), the secret that most impacted me during my childhood was not a secret she kept from me but one that was kept from her : the fact that my brother bullied me.
  • My mother’s refusal to recognize my brother’s treatment of me, despite all the evidence, is what above all allowed it to continue.
  • My brother was four years my elder, and he died two months before my mother died in 2010. He was threatened by my arrival on the scene, fearing I would “upstage him” and steal his thunder. His offense-defense was to bully me and “smother” my voice.
  • In the months leading up to his death (of heroin overdose), I publically explored how I had been “mind-controlled” by him and how in childhood he had “installed” his psyche into mine. Put differently: as a defense against his influence, I developed an inauthentic (“neurotypical”) identity in imitation of my brother, disowning my authentic “solar” self, or autistic (alien) inner soul.
  • Heinrich—as I experience him—is a “bully” who appears to be threatened by the possibility that I will upstage him by writing about Strieber. (This is why my reaching the same conclusions as him did nothing to reconcile him to my existence: on the contrary, it only confirmed that I was a threat who would “steal his thunder.”)
  • Heinrich’s descriptions (on one of the mother.strangled audios) of his drinking binges are characteristic of an alcoholic, just like my mother and brother (before he became a heroin addict).
  • Heinrich has called me a “retard” (long before I self-identified as autistic) and, exactly as my brother did, scorned me for my mystical point of view, calling me insane. His attack was presumably meant to silence me, i.e., “steal my voice.”
  • The site Heinrich co-built is called “mother strangled,” and the very first item on it is his attack on me. The attack is dressed up as a “defense of Strieber.”
  • The term “mother strangled” can be read two ways, as the mother who is strangled, invoking the Earth, Goddess, or anima-soul whose voice is being crushed by the pathological pressures of patriarchal society; or, as the child strangled by the mother, i.e., mother-bondage taken to fatal extremes.
  • Strieber stands in for the (mostly absent) father whose attention Heinrich and I are competing for. (He is like the King who gets to judge our jousting match?)
  • Astrologically, it is Strieber’s Sun (his authentic soul self, his divine, fatherly aspect) with which my own Pluto-Moon aspect is interacting.
  • As my last post clearly illustrates, Heinrich and I have a common goal: to get to the bottom of the Strieber enigma and discover his secret. Our aim is to compel Strieber to “show himself”—become present—and step all the way into his authentic, solar selfness. (“Be yourself Whitley,” is the appeal beneath every line of my article.)
  • It is only if and when the (solar) father steps in (intervenes) to fish the infant child from the mother’s psyche (Plutonian Moon-bondage) that the child can be saved, i.e., made sufficiently safe from secret agreements and hidden regimes of oppression to open, enter into, and express his innermost soul (solar) nature.
  • What is preventing Strieber (the father) from being present for me and Heinrich? In both our views (and that of Gefunden), it is Strieber’s fragmented, deluded ego that’s preventing him from surrendering to the truth of himself, letting down his defended personality, and revealing his authentic self.
  • Strieber’s authentic self corresponds with his inner/autistic/alien soul.
  • Whitley’s wife, Anne Strieber, has written an article at Unknown Country about how the Grays may be autistic.  She has also had trouble with face recognition, a common characteristic of the autistic perceptual mode (link).
  • As the woman behind the public figure, Anne Strieber can be seen to represent Strieber’s “hidden feminine.”
  • The idea of a hidden feminine being part of this narrative came to me when Debbie began posting at the blog about Whitley and me. Prior to that, my wife (who is an autistic-perceptual type) had been providing commentary and feedback to me privately, i.e., behind the scenes. She is also versed in astrology (as is my sister), and Keith Zavatski noticed a similarity between Debbie’s “voice” and my wife’s.
  • This indicated to me that an aspect of the psyche corresponding with the feminine (the anima) was stepping out of the shadows and into the light. Debbie even said that she had been following me for a long time before she found the courage to post publically.
  • Strieber has written and spoken of the female visitor on the cover of Communion in terms that evoke a kind of otherworldly soul mate, i.e., his anima. He has also called her “the greatest master I have ever known.”
  • According to Gefunden, who has met both Whitley and Anne Strieber, Strieber has publically stated that there is a great deal he hasn’t revealed about his relationship with this being, and indicated that his recent work, Solving the Communion Enigma: What is to Come, would reveal some of this material. I have yet to read the book, but from what I know, it does not deliver on Whitley’s promise.
  • So then, is this Whitley’s “secret,” centering upon his relationship with a female “alien” who comes from the otherworldly depths of the unconscious (Pluto), and whom he has described alternatively as a “master” and a kind of soul-mate? (Mater = Mother = Moon)
  • I once had a dream vision (in around 1995) of my mother as a yellow-skinned divine super being in the sky. It was so real to me that, in my naiveté, I believed it was a vision of the future and that I would live to see my mother transformed into the kind of cosmic being which Strieber writes about. (Like others at that time, I at least half-believed the visitors were preparing semi-organic, yellow-skinned plasma-bodies for a select few to inhabit as we entered into hyper-dimensional reality, immediately following the Apocalypse.)
  • In 1991, four years after Communion and more than a decade before he began writing publically about his memories of human interference in childhood, Strieber published a book called Billy, about a child who’s abducted and abused by a psychopath. The book does not end happily. (See Ty Brown’s essay.)
  • Strieber has often referred to the “anal probe” which he underwent at the hands of the visitors (in late 1986) as a “rape.” Since he believes the probe was part of some sort of investigatory procedure, technically speaking it does not match the criteria of rape. Emotionally, however, this is how he remembers it, at least some of the time.
  • In Communion, Strieber describes the after-effects of his 1986 visitor experiences: “I had a feeling of being separated from myself, as if either I was unreal or the world around me was unreal. . . . In the ensuing days, I experienced more bouts of fatigue. I would be working and suddenly would get cold and start to shake. Then I would feel so exhausted that I could not go on, and crawl into bed quivering and miserable, sure that I was coming down with the flu. . . . Nights I would sleep, but wake up in the morning feeling as if I had been tossing and turning the whole time. . . . My disposition got worse. I became mercurial, frantic with excitement about some idea one moment, in despair the next.”
  • These fairly closely match many of the “symptoms” which I have suffered throughout my adult life, and are fairly common to people who have had early experiences of abuse.
  • Returning full circle to Moons and Dwarf-planets: is this the nature of the “secret” which the visitors failed to protect young Whitley from? In other words, is there a matching fractal for my own Pluto-Moon, mother-strangled-brother-bully-absent-father personal history waiting to be uncovered in Strieber’s still more public history (as indicated in the summation of my 2012 Strieber article, “Whitley’s Onion”), in which (roughly speaking) mother = oblivious or indifferent alien overseer; brother = abusive human element; and absent father = the God that did not intervene?
  • At least—until the Master of the Key showed up?
  • Just a thought.

14 thoughts on “The Kephas-Strieber-Mother-Strangled Inner-Outer Connections

  1. “Heinrich—as I experience him—is a “bully” who appears to be threatened by the possibility that I will upstage him by writing about Strieber. (This is why my reaching the same conclusions as him did nothing to reconcile him to my existence: on the contrary, it only confirmed that I was a threat who would “steal his thunder.”) ”

    That’s exactly what a pyschotic would say. LOL.

    Let’s not forget that he shares a similar name (as far as we know) to the king of “alternative perceptions” media.

    Fascinating detective work. A helpful example to follow … as I continue to follow a few loose existential threads over here in my little bundle.

    Thanks The Kephas. 🙂

    — Chris

    • Yesterday I asked myself, I wonder if Pueky follows the blog and if so, why he never comments?

      Nice timing.

      Lucinda mentioned the Heinrich/Henrik overlap recently too. I believe it was around 5 years ago now that we first ticked each other off.

  2. Where have you gone? Did you run off for some reason? We don’t have to like each other to stick together you know.

  3. This is a thorough and nuanced presentation of your thoughts and feelings regarding Streiber’s work and how others have responded publicly to you. You have my deepest gratitude for your kind words. I will offer a few observations, and hope that I will not digress from your themes too greatly. You can tell me at any time to be quiet now:-)

    The word “mother-strangled” is quite powerful and descriptive. It conjures the horror of the placenta wrapped around an infant’s neck, or less extreme, a delivery by forceps (common enough practice in the 1940s, 50s, and 60s). Traumatic birth experience is never forgotten. It is “pre-words” so is not stored in the language centers of the brain, but deep in the emotional centers. The experience will be triggered throughout life in ways we cannot possibly know unless someone who witnessed our birth can tell us. And more often than not, they don’t, if there was trauma. (I refer anyone to the excellent work by Stanislov Grof on birth regression therapy and applied use of psychedelics). Bright lights, particular sounds etc., can easily make us angry for seemingly no reason. But of course, there are reasons.

    You are right to compare the adult responses in language used to describe post-traumatic stress syndrome. The moment of our birth is registered by the stars and planets with complete accuracy, and we must live out that tale. When a person suffers abuse, neglect or trauma, at any time, but particularly at birth and early childhood, there can be many expressions of that trauma. One that I would like to offer here, is “Depersonalization disorder”. Quoting from wikipedia:

    The core symptom of depersonalization disorder is the subjective experience of “unreality in one’s sense of self”,[10] and as such there are no clinical signs. Patients who suffer from depersonalization also experience an almost uncontrollable urge to question and think about the nature of reality and existence as well as other deep philosophical questions. [11]

    These are people who experience trauma by shielding their “self” from their body. Something will trigger them to feel they don’t live in their bodies. I will use myself as an example. I do have this, and once tried to explain to a school psychologist what I felt when I was in a room with fluorescent lights. “I feel like my head is outside my body…like behind my right shoulder looking at me somehow. And I lose the ability to speak, as if I have forgotten how.” The psychologist put it mildly..horrified and told me get over it:D Of course, you can’t…and studying my symptoms allowed me to walk back in time and learn why I have lived with effects of trauma.

    I find the wikipedia definition compelling because it does seem to describe some out-of-body experiences, and the types of people who report them. We certainly are a group who question the nature of reality – we have to, we feel it in our body as a question.

    I sense, Jasun that both you, and the others with whom you have debating Streiber’s work, are getting close to answers. And to answers that are probably quite surprising. Your probing and questions minds won’t let you rest until you have reached back and dig up the gold/truth. The process has a feeling of an initiatory experience. Soul-retrieving and shamanic indeed.

    Could aliens be autistic? This is a very interesting question. I certainly have no answers, although my instincts tell me that when found, the answer will be more complex and nuanced that a “yes” or “no”.

    If a feminine “anima” is rising for Streiber, or yourself, my wish would be that she is a strong but gentle force. One that can answer more questions, than give them. One that can guide and open doors, not bring suffocating fear.

    • A few points in response:

      My birth was induced, not by forceps but by drugs.

      I picked up a book by Stanlislov Grof for $1 at the local library a couple of weeks ago. I’ve only dipped into it but the first thing I did read was to do with birth and immersion in mother’s psyche. There’s an image of a person trapped under a rock representing this experience. I had that morning had a somatic experience of being trapped under a boulder. Moving boulders is part of the gold-prospecting work my wife & I are doing.

      Certain sounds do make me angry for no obvious reason.

      Depersonalization is referred to be Strieber himself in the same passage I quoted from Communion: “(in psychology these feelings are known as depersonalization and derealization and are sorts of dissociative states which can also be induced by various drugs.)”

      These symptoms of unreal-ness are among the most acute which I suffered as a child, as well as fever-related night terrors.

      “Patients who suffer from depersonalization also experience an almost uncontrollable urge to question and think about the nature of reality and existence as well as other deep philosophical questions.”

      That would fit with Thomas’s “splinter in the brain” in The Matrix – the driving force of all authentic seekers?

      In other words, early trauma may be the most effective means of predisposing the individual towards individuation and eventual enlightenment. At the same time, it can be crippling. Clearly not all sufferers of early trauma go on to become spiritual investigators, and based on what I know of Dave Oshana, early trauma isn’t essential to attaining a liberated state.

      But this may be particular to my own path, and account for why I am both attracted to and attract similar types.

      Dissociation from the body (feminine) is key, and also echoes some of my experiences, of seeing the body as if from the outside, or down a tunnel, without actually being perceptually outside it.

      Psychic integration happens not in the mind but in/through the body. We tend to think of “psyche” as corresponding with “mind” but in fact it does not. Psyche means soul and the only way for the soul to come into full (mind) consciousness is for it to land in, and be experienced through (and AS), body.

      Spiritual experiences can result from this soul-body integration; but they can also, more commonly perhaps, be used as a surrogate for it – ie, as a way to bliss out and further dissociate from body awareness into mind fantasy, with some bodily relief. Awakening means re-integrating into present consciousness the somatic distress of early trauma – as such it is, or can be, the very inverse of bliss.

      Bliss states, even when they appear to be bodily ones, may sometimes only be the mind using spiritual fantasy (dissociation) to release anesthetizing chemicals in the body to stave off integration. In other words, the very sort of techniques we learned as infants to protect ourselves from trauma, we then readopt, and adapt, as adults, under the guise of spiritual practices.

      This may relate to the Eastern teaching to avoid “siddhis” (special powers) on the spiritual path, not only as not “it” (true liberation) but as distractions and deviations leading us away from it.

      Perhaps this equates also with what Gefunden discussed with me during our first conversation, regarding Ken Wilber’s Pre/Trans-fallacy? My critical interest in Strieber, Castaneda, de Ruiter, seems to pertain primarily to my belief that they are “guilty” of this error – and my fervent desire to avoid making the same mistake.

  4. “These symptoms of unreal-ness are among the most acute which I suffered as a child, as well as fever-related night terrors.”

    ditto and ditto.

    and I agree, the pre/trans fallacy might be the ultimate pitfall for the authentic seeker

  5. anyone else identify with those symptoms?

    my guess is they have to do with drowning in the mother’s psyche and the absence of the divine dad to fish us out.

    question: what steps in to full that void? > In my case, a dandy from the underworld.

  6. namaste` jake…..a response in relation to the body /soul thing…..i finished matrix warrior and i still think it`s a treatise on buddhism without mentioning buddhism you know death as your friend being the big one……it`s a great book…did you dedicate the original to your tai chi teacher or was i mistaken……in any case the gold prospecting practice you are engaged in is a very special spiritual practice . in my opinion . that has been gifted to you…….i beleive you must pay attention,stay in the moment. you are using the body,and you are connecting with the earth….i will be doing my taichi bare footed this spring summer and fall because of the book EARTHING..i recently read……hope i didn`t stray to far from this thread but i wanted to comment on the soul/body thing take care derm

    • Namaste, Dermott:-) What a beautiful way to express what Jasun is doing – gold prospecting is a spiritual practice and truly is a gift he is receiving. Definitely do your tai chi barefoot and outdoors this spring and summer. Allow your body and soul to soak in that rich, dark, stable energy. In Ayurveda, anyone with an imbalance of Vata dosha (space/ether), should do exactly that, barefoot on earth, digging in earth, planting a garden, along with warm oil massage and lots of warm soups and teas:-) It is important to bring space in contact with earth through our bodies. (Autism is viewed in this light by Ayurveda, also – as an imbalance of too much Vata). I think it is especially important for anyone who spends lots of time in front of computers (very vata device), do go barefoot outdoors:-)

  7. Yep, digging in the dirt isn’t a way to bliss out that’s for sure – but it does offer its own special satisfaction, that of connecting to the earth and being absorbed by one’s natural environment (as opposed to by the Internet). It’s also similar to a not-doing, moving dirt from one place to another to find something that may not be there and that I may not recognize if I see it. Say what?

  8. namaste` debbie and jake…..say what? well jake my favorite buddhist poet jane hirshfield say`s that buddhism can best be described…”EVERYTHING IS CONNECTED,EVERYTHING CHANGES,PAY ATTENTION” the first two are givens maybe,the third we can do something about…..the matrix warrior carrys that message very well and what little i know about prospecting should also…….debbie your comments are much appreciated take care derm

  9. Pingback: PsiOp Radio 171 – 130407 | ANOMALY RADIO

  10. Pingback: Anomaly Archives eNews – Winter 2012 to Spring 2013 « SMiles Lewis

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